Living and Dying with Dignity

I want to wish everyone a Happy National Joylucklovefun Day. Actually, the correct name for the holiday for Colombians today is "DIA DE AMOR Y AMISTAD." For people in the US it is probably going to be called a National Day of Remembrance and Blood Vengeance. A survivor of the WTC disaster, Laura Manning, talking with Terry Gross this morning said she was completely happy that US troops wrote her name on a bomb to drop on a target in Afghanistan. I can't judge her for feeling that way. But the only way I know I'm going to get through this state of perpetual war with any dignity is to try to hold on to at least a molecule of a feeling of mercy towards those who violently attack a perceived threat- perpetuating hate- in the name of religion and God, and likewise a molecule of a feeling of mercy towards those who are reacting violently to being attacked in the name of religion and God- perpetuating more hate. I also try to drive as little as possible, since oil is the beast behind so much violence. I also go to places sacred to me and cry to the gods of my heart that I might see justice done on this earth, in my lifetime, to the highest good of all living beings, and that I might live with dignity and gratitude, the state of grace.


I am not "pro-death" and I am not "pro-life." I will not judge someone for defending themselves, or ending their own life, or ending the life of an unborn fetus, in an effort to avert disaster from themselves or their loved ones. But I will not advocate for another person to put an end to another person's life and call that justice done. I will not advocate for soldiers of this nation to die in Iraq to avert the development of nuclear arsenals by a tyrant displeasing to our government. Saudi Arabia's royal family funds the development of Iraq's nuclear arsenals- a royal family unpunished and even lovingly- kiss kiss, both cheeks- embraced by the Presidents Bush. Does anyone remember Iran? How we - with Saudi Arabia, Kuwait, the UAE, and the UK- helped Iraq develop biochemical weapons to use against Iran? This war we are waging is not random, not arbitrary, and yet it is not in the cause of human rights or democracy. If you think it is about justice, then watch the money, see who benefits from the threat to the US government's targets, and watch who we are not attacking. Never attacking. These allies are not countries who are defenders of human rights, and they are not democracies. Some of them have nuclear capability, and some use biochemical warfare. Why is the US in bed with the nuclear-sabre-rattling Pakistan? Pakistan would be inconvenient to hate right now. Where is the virtue and dignity in my country's oil-addicted alliances?



Today I also mourn the anniversary of my beloved's final diagnosis of cancer of the vertebrae- a cancerous broken neck, a metastisis from her breast cancer. She elected to end her life after a series of radiation treatments that burned her throat and all but prevented her from swallowing even her pain medication for weeks. Today I sent my yes-vote to a national referendum sponsored by Death With Dignity, a group advocating the legalization of physician-assisted suicide.



That about summarizes all I have to say about life and death. This recent poem by Ani Difranco recorded on her new album So Much Shouting, So Much Laughter says some other stuff I believe about the US, my home, this big, muscular, beautiful, confusing, burned, bludgeoned, head-sick, body-sick, heart-sick country.