A Coupla Reasons to Stay in the YouEssAy



I am not alone in thinking it's time to take my anti-war patriotic ass away from this country for a while, while it recovers from its recent blight of warmongering and regime-changing. So as I'm readjusting to speaking nothing but English all the time (today I spelled the name "Maureen" Marine and didn't notice it until later in the day when I reread my notes) I am finding myself grasping for reasons to stay here. It would be an awfully lot more convenient to stay than go.



Today's reasons to like the United States:



Black Mary - a tough 6-foot tall cowboygirl who was an ex-slave sharp-shooter bar-brawler and enterprising sort of woman. She died in 1914 in her 90's. They don't make role models like this in EVERY country.



the International Gay and Lesbian Human Rights Commission - I know, it's self serving, since I work here, but really, I wouldn't get to know how much I dislike the US if this organization - founded in the US - didn't support me galavanting abroad to promote a human rights agenda.



I know I know it's a cliche. But I can't help it. She's one of my role models and she is not only a product of the US but of North-Western New York, not all that far from where I grew up. I'm so glad the RBRmy finally got that freakin' web page going. And look! I didn't know that Ani had signed Bitch-n-Animal! How very cool.



And now a scattershot list of things that occur to me that I put together in a brainstorm session with a few friends.



The Chicago Manual of Style - the exquisite, nervous, extreme fringes of geekiness!



SpongeBob SquarePants - this is a site ONLY for serious fans. SpongeBob is soooo gay. I ate a whole box of SpongeBob SquarePants CheeseNips the day after I got back from Slovenia just to ground myself in the neon orange food group for which the US has become famous.



The Nation - unconventional wisdom for the uppity intellectual.



The Daily Show With John Stewart - oh how John Stewart makes me doubt my lesbianism. In a brainy sort of way.



The Boondocks - the gospel of Huey Freeman, the little black intellectual version of Calvin (from Calvin and Hobbes), from the pen of Aaron McGruder.



The Wild and Massive but Rather Untranslatable Popularity of Buffy the Vampire Slayer That link is to "Buffy the Patriarchy Slayer." One of my (gay) college friends did a thesis on the movie the year it came out-- about how the vampires represented rapists and Buffy represented the new "take back the night" generation. I thought he was so silly to be so obsessed with that movie. And now here I am, obsessed, turning on the TV at 7 am to watch Buffy reruns on FX. Every morning. At 7 am.



Zora Neale Hurston - said Zora I want a busy life, a just mind and a timely death. Well, two out of three ain't bad.

-- I was at an activist meeting about getting California Native American History incorporated into the gold rush centennial celebration studies going on in California public schools, and this cool 5th grade teacher had this poster on her wall. That smile captivated me. I had no idea who Zora Neale Hurston was, but her smile was the smile of a genius, a troublemaker, a confident thinker and mover and shaker. So I wrote down that name and over the years picked up her books and searched out her story. I blogged about her and her connection to Santeria and the creation of zombies here. Zora is now featured on a US stamp, which kind of astonishes. It's like the Vatican producing rainbow flags. Didn't anyone do their research?

Hometown Vertigo



For chrissakes would you all PLEASE go to this website and vote against the war. I know, I know, the war is over, but this pissy ass website, built as a community site for my high school (sigh, a military cow town), has a poll running which gives you the choice of supporting our troops and country (adding to the brave blue column in the poll results) and opposing the war (wussy pink). I'm a goddamn patriot, I just have a HUGE healthy distrust and dislike our government, and sure as hell don't appreciate being given the choice of EITHER supporting our troops or opposing the goddamn war. Now I remember why I grew up angry.



I can't believe spelling bees used to be one of the ways I got award trips to get out of town. I mean, I can't believe I actually used to win trophies for being able to spell in English, I can't believe I used to go to such lengths to get out of town for any period of time, and I can't believe I now, sitting in my San Francisco queer human rights activist office, consider it a long trip out of my way to walk all the way to the Thai lesbian cafe for afternoon espresso instead of just going to the Japanese place on the corner. It's all so dizzying.

Stalking and Killing and Leaving for Dead The Matrix, Reloaded


Well, I liked it, but not ten-dollars' worth of liking it. I would have paid a fiver for that and felt pretty good about it. Ten? Sigh. Luckily we made the extra five dollars worth of fun ourselves by dressing up in black plastic tight clothing and mugging in all the reflective surfaces of the fancy art deco Grand Lake Theater. That was the way to see this super-empty super-sparkly piece of pseudo-zen.



Jesus Figure: of course, Keanu Christ/ Superman Reeves. Uno. Emo. Whatever his name is.



Gay Figure: what a completely compulsively heterosexual movie! I really need some nominations for this one. I just have no idea. OK, I thought that the council member (old white eyebrows-like-wings guy) was going to make a pass at Uno there for a minute, taking him down to the engineering level to show him the whacky machines with all their mechanical thrusting, thrusting, thrusting...



Lesbian Movie Standard (two female characters who have at least one conversation about something other than a man): no chance, kids! This one is pure, pure Hollywood. Although, it was filmed partly in my own backyard, here in Alameda and Oakland! You'd freakin' think they'd have Trinity have some tactical defense conversation with one of the other (many) female warriors, wouldn't you? The tough ladies of Oakland talk to eachother!



So, for your smart science fiction, go rent Starship Troopers. Readhere a Liquidtheater.com review that reflects some of my own thoughts, especially this part (quoting reviewer Mike Shea):

A couple of years ago I was walking through an airport in Stuttgart, Germany. Two 18 year old kids were patrolling the airport armored in flak jackets and armed with sub-machine guns, pistols, and other forms of submission devices. I remember thinking how much nicer our life in America was compared to that. Six months ago I watched a guy in a flack vest and a 9mm pistol poke through my shoes on his steel table while I sat in my socks a few feet away. While wishing I had used more bleach on my grey socks, I thought about how much our life has changed in the last couple of years. Watching Starship Troopers again gave me another dark wake-up call. Watching it again was a far different experience for me today than it was three years ago.

Hear hear. The Matrix Reloaded just didn't chill me. After all, I'm pro-Borg. A totally militarized community freaks me the hell out, on the other hand.



You know, I didn't see any live weapons except for border crossings the whole month I was in the VERY RECENTLY war-torn former Yugoslavia. One day in Oakland and San Francisco and I feel like military helicopters are following me.

When One Is Struggling With a Transition From a Nice, Sensible, Phonetically-Spelled Language Back to English




...it occurs to one that English is extraordinarily capricious in its spelling. Fantastical, even. I came home the other night and hit "play" on my answering machine and failed to write down the number for my dentist because her first name is Polly. I spent the entirety of the message trying to spell the word "Polly." I finally crossed my misspellings out and wrote "Dr. Rivas" -- but by then the machine had deleted her message. The next day I called 411 to get her number. By then I had figured out how to spell her name.



These are some of the ways I would have prefered to spell my dentist's first name:




Paulie

Palli

Poli

Poly



Another time when I was flitting back and forth between the sensibly spelled Russian language and whack-a-mole krazy-quilted English I was completely unable to piece together the correct spelling of the word "carousel." My first attempt was karasol. I think I was three paragraphs down the page when the faintest annoyance of a suspicion of error drew me back to check the spelling of the word. I was so out of range of the correct spelling that my spellcheck turned up a complete blank, except for maybe suggesting "kerosene."



I have plenty of witty and insightful things to write about Slovenija and Croatia, really. I just haven't settled back into my loving, snuggly relationship with English yet. I took myself to Borders and got a pile of books--- that was a nice first date. I'll let you know how the romance rekindles.

Aren't We All Russian Teenage Lesbians?



This just sent to me by my friend I'll pseudononymously call AlAl:



Morissey, former singer of The Smiths, who originally wrote and
performed the song "How Soon Is Now?" in 1984 had this to say about
t.A.T.u. in the U.K.'s Word Magazine:

Word: Did you hear t.A.T.u.'s version of "How Soon Is Now?"

Morissey: Yes, it was magnificent. Absolutely. Again, I don't know
much about them.

Word: They are teenage Russian lesbians.

Morissey: Well, aren't we all?

Soon come: reportage from my month-long Adriatic Odyssey, when I feel my grasp of English (as opposed to Slovinglish or Croanglish) firming up a little more.

A postcard from the edge of the alps



OK, here is the breakdown.



Croatia and Slovenia are like my first and second born. I cannot choose between them. I could live either place. There is nothing keeping me from moving here except for my job and my cat and about a dozen permanant obligations.


The places they call tourist traps here are what I call comfortable populated and slightly more expensive but still worth a visit. I have not yet (in three weeks of travel around Croatia and Slovenia) found a place I couldn't feel comfortable living.


The queer scene in Croatia is having a renaissance, and I am blessed to have participated in the first ever explicitly queer (as in, not just lesbian) conference held in Croatia. I made contacts with Serbian, Bosnian, Macedonian, and of course Croatian and Slovenian activists who are professional, smart, young,and determined to succeed. The future is bright here.


I will now go back to the edge of Bled, the pristine alpine lake in the south central alps. I will be back on my regular posting schedule in a week.


Stalking on....